Sigh... I really wish I was reporting some good news here. I mean, as far as the last month is concerned, i suppose this actually is good news. It's just not saying much is all, but everything is relative. It certainly isn't the news I had hoped for. Our big appointment that was supposed to be a game changer is by far the one that has been the most successful. So, there is that to be grateful for. However, she is far from where she needs to be.
The upside to all this I guess is that similarly to how illness tends to appear, healing can happen spontaneously too. She has seen the specialist she saw 10 days ago one more time since, and we are actually on our way to see him again today. We're not putting all of our eggs in this one basket by any stretch of the imagination, but he has been the best so far, and we want to keep things going with him. Hopefully today helps tremendously, but we just don't know anymore.
For those of you wondering, "What's even going on with Tanya?" Sadly, we really don't know. We're still trying to determine the cause of her symptoms. In an effort to respect Tanya's privacy and still keep you guys informed, I can say that Tanya's current state is exhaustion above all else. She has no energy to do anything and basically can't move, be productive, and physically function throughout the day. While she might technically be awake and conscious, she isn't able to do anything. She's in a lot of pain from migraines more than anything, but her stomach pain has not subsided completely and comes and goes in waves. The most improvements have been with her stomach pains as they are no longer constant and completely debilitating, but improvement is extremely slow.
Now, let me give you some good news. Tanya had a big event in NYC last week. I don't want to reveal too much as she wants to be the one to tell you all about it, but it is very exciting and she's is overwhelmed, thrilled, and honored to have been invited to it, not to mention still on cloud 9 because of it. Getting there was a nightmare as she isn't fit to make it to the kitchen, let alone travel, but she would have had to be dead to miss this one. She was barely able to stand up for the whole day leading up to the event, and as soon as we got back to the room, she was vomiting. Sorry, possibly TMI, but I'm sure it could be a little confusing as to how she can't film videos, but she can make it to NYC. That's a fair question. However, to that I would say, she barely made it to NYC, and it took absolutely everything out of her. Honestly, she kept saying, "babe... I don't know how I'm going to make it through tonight" while she was getting ready in the room. In hindsight, I think she just rode adrenaline through the pain.
Anyway, we are currently getting ready for 2 more appointments today. I hope things start getting better more quickly, but I'm not going to make any more speculations on time frame to recovery. Every single one I have made to date has been wrong. To the few of you who have been wondering if she has given up on YouTube, that could not be farther from the case. I know this has been the longest absence she has had from her channel, but she is DYING to get back behind the camera. Honestly (a word that the beauty community seems to be struggling with these days), this is driving her absolutely mad! The pain, discomfort, and exhaustion are not the only symptoms she's having, frustration is also a major one. Not being able to do anything but lay there is not something our little OCD queen is able to take in stride. Far from it. Don't give up on her. She certainly hasn't! She is not going anywhere!! This is just temporary.
Thank you all for your prayers, concern, well wishes, and kind words. You are all amazing, and I have read her everything that has come in from everyone. No, she hasn't forgotten how to read, but her head is so sensitive these days that the littlest bit of light can trigger a migraine, so why take the risk? You know?
Thank you all again and stay tuned for more updates. I hope you're all having a great start to the week.